Your story is not over yet. ;

For years I’d been wanting to get a semicolon tattoo ever since I’d been introduced to the Semicolon Project. Not only am I a grammar nerd but I also love what the semicolon represents on a deeper level.

What’s the Semicolon Project?

The Semicolon Project was founded by Amy Bleuel in an effort to combat suicide and raise awareness about suicide. While Amy unfortunately succumbed to taking her own life, her work lives on.

Why does the Semicolon Project resonate with me?

I’ve been dealing with suicidal problems since I was 12. I remember being fascinated with a knife in the middle of the night, daring myself to either slit my wrists or plunge it through my abdomen. I did neither of those things at the time but it kicked off a lifelong obsession with death and taking my own life.

Suicide has always seemed to be the answer to everything. Are kids making fun of me? If I jump off the balcony, that’ll end that. Is work going terribly? Walking into oncoming traffic will solve that issue. Have my emotions plunged into the abyss of nothingness, never to resurface? Well, why don’t I just bring my physical self to where my emotions already are?

Enter the semicolon.

I tried explaining the meaning of the semicolon to my therapist who simply thought I got the tattoo because I love grammar so much. That’s the surface reason; but I love the fact that there’s a deeper meaning to it that reflects who I am.

What did I try telling my therapist?

A semicolon joins 2 complete thoughts. What really could’ve been a period, indicating finality, is replaced by a semicolon, which represents an interruption—a brief pause in the middle of a story.

Consider the placement of the semicolon. The first thought is complete and can stand alone. If someone wanted to, they could end their story (that first thought) right there. But the semicolon indicates that there’s more to the story—there’s more to come. A semicolon represents a “blip,” if you will, in the middle of the sentence. The sentence (like my life) could’ve ended there but it didn’t. The semicolon means that my story can continue, that the second half of the story (the second complete thought) can happen before a final ending (the period).

My story will end eventually (period), but the semicolon reminds me that I don’t have to be the one to end it. That I can continue my story. That whatever I’m going through is only a blip—an interruption—and that there’s more to come.

I suppose I suck at the layman’s terms for this. Basically it means “your story isn’t over.”

I’ve been feeling very lazy the past couple of weeks. First, I was all hyped up to start my blog and get back into writing. Now, I find it exhausting to generate content. Most of the time, I don’t even want to write let alone read. I am blogging right now through sheer force of will. (And by the power of the WordPress app.)

My pregnancy test is Wednesday and I have no idea how it’s going to go. I’m having weird symptoms but it COULD or COULD NOT mean that I’m pregnant. I guess we will see.

My vacation from work starts Monday and ends on the following Monday. While I love what I do, I’m looking forward to taking a break for a while.

I’m dealing with some terrible heartburn lately. Thank God antacids are safe for pregnant women.

Trying a new church tomorrow and bringing my son along. Let’s see what happens…

Friday Feeling

I haven’t felt like writing recently. I’ve been in such a fog. Feeling lazy and unmotivated. What can I say that doesn’t involve me explaining why the Eagles suck this season?

Things have been steady and neutral. My son’s behavior isn’t as troublesome at school and work isn’t driving me nuts (at the moment).

Wednesday I find out the results of my pregnancy test. Hoping, wishing, and praying for a positive outcome.

App Review: Laundry Day

Laundry Day is a very basic app but incredibly useful when you’re ignorant to what different laundry symbols mean. Don’t remember what that circle means? Laundry Day can help with that!

It’s not an app I use often but it’s one that I find indispensable, especially after buying new clothing.

Laundry Day has a scanner that, when placed over a tag of laundry symbols, will recognize them and define them for you. No more trying to figure out how the heck to wash your clothing!

Symbols defined include washing, bleaching, drying, ironing, and professional care.

If you need more info and tips, Laundry Day has you covered. With a Tips and Tricks section, you’ll be guided through the steps to launder a perfect (err, dirty?) load.

There’s also a section on How to Use Your Washing Mashine appropriately, and Common Clothing Materials, such as cotton, silk, and velvet, and how to best wash each material.

There truly is an app for everything.

Word Wednesday: Project Semicolon

Something a little different today. Translating grammar into real life.

Project Semicolon is an organization that was founded by Amy Bleuel to raise awareness about the prevention of suicide. Per the foundation:

Our work is based on the foundation and belief that suicide is preventable and everyone has a role to play in preventing suicide.

Being someone who has dealt with suicidal thoughts and tendencies since I was 12, Project Semicolon is an organization that is near and dear to my heart.

I searched high and low for other black people who had a semicolon tattooed to their wrist but all I found (TBH) were images of no one but white people. So the picture above is of my wrist. It’s in black and white, but it reflects my skin undertone and quite frankly…me.

But why the semicolon? Why not some other form of punctuation?

Project Semicolon’s tagline is “Your story isn’t over yet.” As I have heard it explained, the reason the semicolon was chosen is because, in grammar, it connects two complete thoughts. It’s sort of a blip in the midst of a sentence. It’s not a period that indicates finality (the end of a sentence), and it’s not a comma (just a pause). The thought that comes before a semicolon can stand on its own. It could be the end. But it’s not. There’s more to the story; there’s more to come.

The semicolon (through Project Semicolon) reminds people around the world that whatever they’re going through is merely an interruption. It could be the end of their life story but it doesn’t have to be. I identify with this thought. So many times I have wanted to end my life. But that semicolon reminds me that all of these tough moments are “blips.” My story isn’t over yet. I don’t have to end it.